Hello!
Good Morning,
Hello, Hi, Welcome!
I’m so happy to have you here. I hope you enjoy the first post of The Self & Society.
Make sure and pop a comment at the bottom, tell me what you enjoyed reading about and leave love notes for future blog posts.
Excitement, gratitude and commitment is flooding my entire body and my mindset could not be clearer.
The Self & Society has been created after going through a couple of name transitions over the last couple of years and a to-ing and fro-ing over the aims of and vision I held for this venture. But before we get into where we’re going, let’s look back and see where we’ve came from.
The Beginning
Maternity Leave, Autumn, 2018, First time Mum and struggling with identity, stimulation, rumination, intrusive thoughts and nearly constant worry, I came across the wonder that is Coaching.
A way to recognise my present situation and experiences, a way to build my confidence, faith and skills in living a healthier, meaningful and fulfilling way. A way to unlock the dusty doors of my past and challenge what needed challenging, accepting what was, building perspective and compassion. Coaching is not therapy, I didn’t need therapy. I needed a way forward.
A new worry unlocked…
The worry of judgement about exploring coaching and making it my career. Coaching is not a new industry, yet, here in Ireland and Northern Ireland, it is fairly new and emerging. I knew that colleagues scoffed at the idea of a ‘life coach’, I’d heard them gossip and diss other’s who were pursuing this same path. I knew it happened. I didn’t want it happening to me. But I also knew the creativity, the passion and the possibilities of coaching were limitless and so, I carried my worry straight to the social media doors of incredible coaches the world over, enrolled on coaching certifications and business building courses. I made sure my social media feeds were empowering, influential and inspiring. My feed was made up of the kind of people who were open minded, growth focussed and resilient.
Mindset Shift
I could have let the weight of others opinions suffocate me but I chose to distance myself from their paths. They had their own lives to lead and I didn’t need them influencing mine in such a negative manner.
And so, I started my coaching practice back in 2019, very low key and still nervous about all of it, the coaching, my ability, other’s whispering down the corridor. Surprisingly, there was a lot of supportive people (unlock childhood limiting beliefs here) and thankfully, I had wonderful clients who trusted me with their stories.
By Summer 2020, I was now a mummy of two. And in 2021, I returned to my social work job. Early 2022, lo and behold, life challenges crept up and due to a lack of self-care, external pressures and a childhood created, ‘I can do everything and anything’ attitude, I quite literally plummeted over the course of a weekend.
Pressures from my job caused me to default back to factory settings and I just done enough to get by in the ways I knew best. Head down, temper and rumination up and keep on going.
Recovery
I took a break from work, practised self-care, paid attention to my thoughts, reactions, behaviours, analysed the absolute shite out of them and built myself up stronger, more confident and with a greater ability to stand up for myself in a way that was in line with my values and integrity.
The spark was still sparkling…
And thank goodness it was. While there is so much learning from this period in my life, that is a story for another day.
2022, was when I decided that if 4 years later, the thirst for coaching and psychology was still burning, then it must be for good reason. I had a stand at a wellness event like no other in Northern Ireland and got to see first hand the wonderful people local and far that will support you even if they’ve never met you before. At last, my kind of people.
2023, I took on another role. A role I love, trauma informed, therapeutic approaches, childhood experiences and adversity but most of all, recovery, future focussed. A dream. A gift. I enrolled in a Master in Psychology. And in the early days of 2024, I had my third baby.
And so it continues…
My passion for growth focussed coaching, knowledge and skills.
Bringing this to the adult children of unhealthy and adverse experiences.
To light the way to better days.
But, it didn’t really start in 2018…
I am the adult child of adverse experiences, of environments that can negatively impact social, emotional and mental wellbeing. I, unknowingly, coached myself out of the worst periods of my life, my early 20’s.
I’ve walked this path. I know how isolating it is. I know how we can truly believe that no-one will understand or worse, judge us, for the thoughts we have. I don’t want others to experience the depths of their minds alone nor to be a slave to their labels or the expectations of others or themselves.
And so, The Self & Society was born in 2024.
THE SELF & SOCIETY
Personal development coaching that is not only about mindset, mindfulness and self-care but also explores external factors and influences. I truly value the development of self-compassion, but, how we carry this into our communities, our families and our society is so vitally important. As is, the development of boundaries, of kindness, of understanding and respect. I not only want to support individuals, I believe this can accumulate and positively impact our families, our environments and our circles.
Moreover, how is society impacting us as individuals. How are we shaped from external influences and what can we do about it when it doesn’t feel right. All the internal work in the world will support you as far as it can. All the boundaries in your life can only protect you so far.
Living a life in line with your values is the magic in blending the internal and external. The Self & Society.
Are you ready to learn how personal development coaching can help you? Enquire now about individual sessions and packages.
With Love,
xx
